Dreams (The Poem)

They say go to school
They tell us to study
They give us standardized tests
Like we were all the same student
They tell us we need to grow up
That we need to put away the toys
Our fantasies are only that
We rebel, we ditch school
We try bad things
And then we are punished
But none of it matters
We graduate, go to college or get a job
We learn a trade or we do nothing
We peddle around trying to find ourselves
I want to say that they are wrong
That there is truth, there is hope
But I would be lying
They are right
Dreams are for dreamers
But dreamers get nowhere
Society demands a job, money, family, status
Yet I cannot crush anyone else's dream
For my own brought me friends, light
And the boy who would be most special to me
Dreams may mean nothing
But hold onto them as long as you can
That is the advice I can give
Even if it doesn't mean much

The Path

The darkness it haunts me
Trees are cold and still
Alone beneath the crescent moon
Afraid
Stumbling forward, whispers in the night
I have been here before
Yet it is strange
I'm uneasy, alone
But the others are here
Together and apart
We stumble, we search
Hope comes up empty
Still we press along
Waiting for the end, for knowledge
The dawn will restore our faith
When we learn to believe again
And clear emotions will show us
What we desire most
The Truth will set us free
And we are finally home

The Band Game

Though I've tried the trumpet, piano, and even thought about toying with something like Fruity Loops, I'm not the musical type. But if I was, this would be my band. Awesome, isn't it?

Name: Stedman Prescott

Debut Album: Friends Are My Estate

My Cover:





Lastly, this is how you do it. Pretty fun stuff for the bored and easily amused.

1. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random The first article title on the page is the name of your band.
2. http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3 The last four words of the very last quote is the title of your album.
3. http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days/ The third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

You do what you love and screw the rest

Quote from Dwayne in Little Miss Sunshine:

"You know what? Fuck beauty contests. Life is one fucking beauty contest after another. School, then college, then work... Fuck that. And fuck the Air Force Academy. If I want to fly, I'll find a way to fly. You do what you love, and fuck the rest."

I rewatched that movie the other night, and when he said this to his uncle, it really hit me. That is so true, every part of it (except the air force, at least for me). Screw everyone else and everything else. If you like it, if it makes you happy, do it. Don't let anything get in the way. They don't matter. Being happy matters. Doing what you love to do, feeling good, it means more than some stupid beauty contest.

That is all I have to say. I love to write about my characters, and I don't care if anyone reads it or it ever gets published. I like it. It makes me happy, just like the thought of being a teacher makes me want to say screw it all and just go for it. Maybe I really am motivated this time around.

Dreams

So instead of going to sleep, I am posting another blog after touring my Myspace groups. I had the weirdest dream last night, and when I woke up, it felt real even though it was completely improbable. First of all, I had these friends I had never met before. We took a plane to Europe (?), and I had the insane idea we could fly back in time for my shift at five that night. On the way home, I call my store from my cell and tell my manager I probably won't be in that night 'cause I'm stuck on a plane. Then I'm searching for someone to tell me when we'll land. There was something about the Grand Canyon and a fridge full of little mini alcohol bottles. I went to try this stuff called Hypnotiq, but I dumped it out instead. I remember clearly talking to my manager, and the people I was with gave me this bad feeling. I didn't even remember my dream until I was at work. I told my two mangers about it, and they thought it was funny. I do too, but it was more weird than anything for me.

I kind of know what it means, but then again, I don't. The being late and flying somewhere I've always wanted to visit could mean I feel that place is holding me back. That's why I'm in school, though. The dumping of the liqueur means that I threw away the last bottle I am going to buy for a while because I don't need to be doing that every night like I have been. It isn't good for anyone, especially my family where alcoholism runs and when I liked getting drunk since the first time when I was 16. I got sick at the beginning of my senior year when my friend mixed wines together. He threw it all up right then. I didn't but wanted to for the next three days because I had every other symptom on the Pepto Bismol bottle. Then I drank all that vodka at his house later that year and passed out and almost broke my nose. Not good times.

So yeah. I hope I truly am motivated this time around. I am tired of the status quo and would like to move on as soon as possible. I've been in a rut the last two years or so, and now I need to go forward again.

5 Random Things

1. I have liked politics since I was nine at least. I watched the 1996 presidential election with my dad and rooted for Clinton though that was partly because of what my parents believed. That school year we had a crash course in government because of the election, and it intrigued me right away. My political science teacher even said I should come over to their side when I told him I was studying biology.

2. I was born three weeks early thus making me a Gemini instead of a Cancer. My grandma was visiting my cousin Dan who was born three months earlier in Massachusetts, and she told my mom to wait for her to come home or have me on her birthday, which was June 8. I was born 6/8/86 around two in the afternoon so at least she got one thing she asked for. My other grandma was born June 10. Geminis are fun people, too (as if being a girl wasn't a good enough excuse to have mood swings).

3. I've hit my head very forcefully at least five times, one of those giving me a concussion. So far there's no recognizable damage, even the one time where my friend hit me hard with a wooden stick directly to the right side of my head. I looked up from reading and simply asked, "Did you just hit me?" I've never broken a bone, but I have a tendency to get scars, including a burn from boiling hot coffee pot water, stitches when I was a year, and a deep cut from my "safety" cutter at work. But I'm not that much of a klutz, I promise.

4. I took a SCUBA class in my tenth grade year, but the pool gave me an ear infection. The doctor wouldn't let me get back in the pool, and because I missed a day without a note, I got a C. This pool also turned my hair green and gave me a bruise just because I didn't dive right. (Stupid water. Apparently everyone said, "Oooh!" when I hit the surface. It hurt.) I haven't been swimming since 2002.

5. When I was six I played with this program called Storybook Weaver on our old PC. I learned how to run DOS to load it and everything. Since then I have been writing in some form. I may not have put words down, but I was always thinking about why I laid each scene out the way I did on the game. I even had one of my short stories submitted by my seventh grade teacher to a contest. That same year is also when I originally fell in love with science, more so biology.

Part of the Process

I'm excited that I get to be a part of history this coming February. As hopefully many are aware of, February 5 is Super Tuesday when 22 states holds their primary elections. When I was a student in my senior year, my government teacher told us of a student poll worker program. Since she was head of the department and it was an AP course, most if not all of her students from our school got in. I had a blast quite honestly. I woke up at five in the morning, had a cup of cinnamon bun oatmeal and a bagel, and was driven by my grandma. On the way there she asked if I would like a Starbucks, but I declined, for some reason thinking they wouldn't have a bathroom and there wouldn't be a chance to go. Of course, there was. The polling place was actually the old theater on Haven by the bowling alley. It had been converted into a church, and each individual theater of the three or four on the ground floor was a different room (adults, kids, teens), which I thought was really cool. They showed up around eight after the polls closed, and I could hear their music as we were cleaning up. They sounded like they were having fun, and even though I didn't and don't subscribe to a religion, I admired that. Anyway, I remember that day so clearly. I worked with two very nice old ladies, another woman, a man, and our inspector was a middle age guy. He took me with him when he dropped off the ballots, and then he dropped me off at home. It was on some dirt road in the dark, and it seemed all top secret. I had Del Taco for lunch because my mom gave me five dollars for food, I brought my notebook along to write, and I tried reading 1984. Overall I had an awesome, if not tiring, day. As an added bonus, they pay you though this doesn't compare to everything else.

So I signed up to do it again! Four years later in the 2008 primary, I will be on the frontlines once more. I'll be stationed at the mobile home park my dad and grandma lived in, and it's right down the street. My training class is the 17th at nine in the morning, and my brother will be a poll worker this time with me. I'll have to miss my bowling class, but that's alright. I'll let the coach know in advance. I'm going to try and contribute to CNN if I can with iReports. I already let my supervisor know ahead of time that I want to, and though this semester I am asking for a lot of leeway with school, it is about time I seriously put school ahead of everything. I love every class I am about to take, especially the PE classes (I heart archery ever since high school when we did it Sophomore year...hopefully I'll be better this time around and not lose an arrow in the grass somewhere).

Readability Update

My blog is smart. :-D

Update

I still have a cough though it is thankfully lessening. However, it seems I have developed an immunity to my cough syrup as I take more to get the same effect.

I have decided to apply to be a poll worker for the upcoming primary. I was a student worker in 2004 and got a paycheck and a really cool pin.

I finally decided on classes and am happy. I am taking bowling and archery and look forward to being in a classroom for my education class.

I have decided I don't really like trance anymore or at least the new stuff. It faded as an interest for me the same way as anime. I don't know how this is possible, but I am not too into music anymore. Maybe it's the lack of some new sounds and bands.

It's raining and isn't supposed to stop the whole weekend. Yay, especially because I am off on Sunday.

I am mostly happy about things.

Last.fm Top Ten

Since I actually started listening to music on my PC, these are what I play most often.

ATB
Shiny Toy Guns
Rubikon
Amy Studt
Avril Lavigne
Fischerspooner
Daft Punk
Vanessa Carlton
Headstrong ft. Tiff Lacey
Barenaked Ladies

Unpleasant Sight

-A dose cup full of yet more cough syrup

-A glass of Mountain Dew, which looks like something else yellow

Something even worse: a constant non-productive cough that leaves my head, neck, and abdomen sore. Being sick sucks, but the lingering cough sucks worse.

Stuff To Do This Year

1. Write more, both prose and poetry. Try to improve at it.

2. See someone about transferring to a four year university.

3. Keep my room cleaner.

4. Sell the Waste of Money (Xbox 360) on ebay.

5. Play my Wii more.

6. Walk my dog at night again.