Dreams (The Poem)

They say go to school
They tell us to study
They give us standardized tests
Like we were all the same student
They tell us we need to grow up
That we need to put away the toys
Our fantasies are only that
We rebel, we ditch school
We try bad things
And then we are punished
But none of it matters
We graduate, go to college or get a job
We learn a trade or we do nothing
We peddle around trying to find ourselves
I want to say that they are wrong
That there is truth, there is hope
But I would be lying
They are right
Dreams are for dreamers
But dreamers get nowhere
Society demands a job, money, family, status
Yet I cannot crush anyone else's dream
For my own brought me friends, light
And the boy who would be most special to me
Dreams may mean nothing
But hold onto them as long as you can
That is the advice I can give
Even if it doesn't mean much

The Path

The darkness it haunts me
Trees are cold and still
Alone beneath the crescent moon
Afraid
Stumbling forward, whispers in the night
I have been here before
Yet it is strange
I'm uneasy, alone
But the others are here
Together and apart
We stumble, we search
Hope comes up empty
Still we press along
Waiting for the end, for knowledge
The dawn will restore our faith
When we learn to believe again
And clear emotions will show us
What we desire most
The Truth will set us free
And we are finally home

Rainy Monday

I tried to keep up
Really I did
But I tripped, I stumbled
And the world kept moving
Time still flowed, the endless river
Sol replaced, Luna, Luna replaced Sol
The pattern infinite as space itself
The same black darkness
That now consumes my being
Eating away at me slowly
Each day, a new lost part
Squinting to see those so far ahead
Losing myself in the underbrush
Of the dark path
There is no escape
The cycle, the path
As everlasting as the darkness
That haunts me still

2/10/05

The Walk

It was a spring evening that, for all appearances, seemed like any other. The sun had all but disappeared on the horizon, its pink hues mixing in the baby blue sky. It was so simple, but yet it was still a most amazing sight. Voices from the park were carried on the gentle breeze as children laughed and played joyfully, knowing that the school year was coming to a close. Their elementary school was to the west, just beneath the glowing ball. At one time it was my school as well, and there had begun the journey of academia. It had been five years since the promotion to the awkward transitional stage of intermediate school, and already I was half way through high school. Not much had changed in that time save for the company I kept. Through all the fighting that year, we all stuck together, trying as desperately as everyone else to figure out life. We all thought we were different, even chosen as we dubbed ourselves. None of this would matter. The school year was not the only thing coming to an end. As strong as our bonds were, they had suffered the strains and been fractured just enough to release easily. The ravaging of time could not have compared with what we did to ourselves. New bonds were forming. Comrades were leaving. And in the midst of this change, a curious urging compelled me to grab my scooter that afternoon and take off. The spot I stood in as I watched the sunset, felt the wind, and heard the kids playing was the point at which four paths diverged. That chapter of my life was over at that moment, and I knew that never again would I look at the park the same way. At the same time, there were new ways to go, a new phase to embrace. Instead of longing for what was coming to a close, it was something to stride forth into. About to turn sixteen and lose much of what had become important, I took the path I used least, knowing I never again would. Somehow in that moment I realized everything had changed. Everything was as mutable as the wind, and actually, it felt okay.