And so it goes

"I never thought I'd get here / I was so far away."

Okay, that line is from a song about love, but it fits with how I feel about transferring finally. I was thinking about this last quarter as I waited for the signal to change to cross the street. I graduated high school and went to Chaffey because it was expected of me. It wasn't necessarily something I wanted. I was still floating through life trying to figure it out. Not that I was not intending on graduating high school, but this was also something I was doing because I was supposed to. The same kind of goes for getting a job and then staying there (for five plus years so far). It was expected, not what I wanted.

This changed, and I can still pinpoint the times it did. I was driving home from Target in 2008 and just the idea of being a teacher made me happy in this way I could not express in any other way except to speed and drive without care (which I had to hold in). Then after I applied to UCR in July it was still something I felt I was doing because I needed to for someone else (my grandma).

That day as I stood there at the signal, I thought, gosh, I really am here at UCR. I earned this. I wanted this. I did it. Now I am actively working towards graduation, and every so often, the feeling hits that, wow, I'm at the university I dreamed of (I don't care what anyone else says about UCR). Who would have thought I would end up here, especially after dropping out last spring and changing majors abruptly?

Sometimes life discourages me. Then I think of what I have accomplished despite the bumps, and I feel like I've done what I wanted after all. I even think that, if my dad's energy is floating around out there, I've made him proud since he couldn't stick around on Earth long enough to see what I have done. That above all makes me happy.

Now...onto graduation, grad school, and teaching.